Mindset For Rowers
There are moments in an athlete’s journey that linger long after the last stroke is taken. A promising race unraveled by a crab. A top nut snapping loose at the worst time. A season’s worth of work poured into a final that doesn’t go to plan. If you’re a rower, you’ve likely experienced it—or you will. These setbacks are part of the sport, and part of life. Developing a strong mindset for rowers means learning how to process those disappointments, respond with purpose, and come back stronger.
Whether you’re an 8th grader just learning how to feather, a high school senior gunning for nationals, a collegiate varsity rower, or a masters athlete chasing your best, the lessons of loss transcend age, skill level, and experience. This blog is about what happens after the finish line—when the result doesn’t match the effort—and how you can transform disappointment into momentum.
Why Loss Hurts: The Emotional Weight of Expectation
Let’s be honest—loss hurts. We train, we sacrifice, we visualize success. So when it doesn’t happen, there’s an emotional weight that can be hard to shake. We feel disappointment because we care. Because we poured a piece of ourselves into the outcome.
The first step is to feel it. Acknowledge the emotion. Don’t rush past it or pretend it doesn’t exist. It’s okay to be gutted after a bad race or season. That reaction means you’re invested. But then, at the right moment, comes the most important part: how do you respond?
Keep Your Poise: Character in the Chaos
Poise in the face of adversity is what separates great athletes and teammates from the rest—and it’s a cornerstone of a resilient mindset for rowers. If someone on your crew catches a boat-stopping crab in the last 500 meters, your reaction matters. If your bowman didn’t check their rigger bolts before launching, piling on after the fact doesn’t fix anything.
What builds team culture is support, not blame. And what builds personal strength is the ability to step back, reflect, and own your role honestly. I tell every novice rower I coach: “It’s okay to make mistakes on this team.” But the next part of that message is equally critical: “What matters most is what you do next.”
Honest Reflection: The Self-Audit
Disappointment is a signal. It can point to areas of growth, if you’re brave enough to look. Ask yourself:
Did I give my best effort?
Was my preparation truly complete?
What lessons did this season teach me?
Reflection isn’t self-punishment. It’s a tool—and a key part of developing the right mindset for rowers. As Socrates once said, “The unexamined life is not worth living.” And for athletes, the unexamined season is a missed opportunity.
Personal Story: When Loss Led Me to the Church
When I was a varsity rower at Boston University, our record was… let’s just say less than stellar. We rowed against giants: Dartmouth, Yale, Syracuse, Brown. Losses piled up. I remember one especially tough stretch where our boat just couldn’t catch a break. One day, after another difficult race, I walked across campus and found myself sitting quietly in the BU chapel.
Now, I’m not particularly religious, but something about getting quiet, being still, and reconnecting with something beyond the noise helped me reset. I sat there for an hour, and something shifted. My training clicked. The boat felt better. We found rhythm. That quiet moment gave me perspective.
The takeaway? You don’t have to believe in anything specific. But finding space for stillness—whether that’s meditation, prayer, or a long walk in the woods—can reconnect you with your inner compass.
Wisdom from Wayne Dyer: Get Quiet and Listen
One of the thinkers who has deeply influenced my coaching and life is Wayne Dyer. In one seminar, he shared how he would ask his higher self or the universe, “I need guidance,” and then wait. That’s it. No demands. Just patience.
We live in a world of constant input. But high performance sometimes requires subtraction, not addition. Getting quiet is how you hear the deeper wisdom inside yourself.
Whether you call it reflection, prayer, or meditation, the point is to pause. In the pause, the lesson often arrives.
Write It Down: The Power of Processing on Paper
When things are tangled in your mind, writing can bring clarity. One of the most effective tools for athletes—and an essential practice in building a strong mindset for rowers—is the post-season review.
Post-Season Reflection Worksheet:
What were your top 3 goals this season?
Which goals did you achieve? Which didn’t happen?
What were your greatest strengths this season?
What were the limiting factors?
How did your mindset help or hinder your performance?
What feedback did you receive from coaches or teammates?
What moments stood out as turning points?
What can you do differently next time?
This isn’t about dwelling on what went wrong. It’s about building a bridge to what comes next.
Another Story: Feedback That Stung
Not long ago, someone left a comment on my YouTube channel saying they couldn’t respect my rowing advice because of my weight. That hurt. And I’d be lying if I said it didn’t get under my skin. But I took a deep breath, responded with grace, and wished them well. The comment was later deleted.
The point isn’t to pretend it didn’t sting—it did. But when someone hands you a metaphorical bag of manure, I’ve learned to look for the gold nugget inside. What’s the takeaway? What’s the lesson? Sometimes even negative feedback holds value if you view it through the right lens.
From Loss to Legacy: Giving Disappointment Meaning
I’ve experienced deep loss in my life—the kind that stays with you. When my father passed, it was a blow I carried for a long time. But as I healed, I found that the meaning I assigned to that loss helped shape who I became. His lessons, his voice, his wisdom became part of how I coach.
In rowing, as in life, disappointment often comes when our vision of what should happen doesn’t match what does. That mismatch is where pain lives. But it’s also where transformation begins.
When you reframe a loss as a stepping stone—when you decide that it happened for you, not to you—you reclaim your power.
Final Thoughts: Let the Setback Set You Up
If you’re reading this after a tough season, a painful race, or a life moment that knocked you off center, I want you to know this:
You are not alone.
The disappointment you feel is a doorway to growth.
You have the tools to bounce back.
As a coach with nearly three decades of experience, I’ve seen countless athletes fall short, fall down, and rise again stronger than before.The next level is available to you—but it requires a mindset for rowers rooted in ownership, compassion, and relentless curiosity.
If you’re looking for guidance, mentorship, or a sounding board, I’m here to help. My coaching is grounded in experience, reflection, and a genuine belief in the human spirit’s ability to grow through adversity.
